Friend makes aliyah, then changes his mind, what to do with presents, etc... |
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 Jul 25 2008, 09:27 AM
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#1
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 Mr. Garrison is back!  Group: Members Posts: 5,222 Joined: 20-April 05 From: Omicron-Persei 9 Member No.: 1,432  |
Suppose your friend and his family (wife, 2 kids) made aliyah. Before he left, his friends threw him a big party, sponsored kiddush in shul, etc...
A few weeks later he changes his mind, realizing Israel just isn't the place for him. Should he have to pay everyone back for their expenses? -------------------- Nothing, I have nothing to say.
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Jul 25 2008, 09:28 AM
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 Gabbai  Group: Members Posts: 739 Joined: 26-January 06 From: chicago, il Member No.: 2,285 |
Put him on the phone with Pinchas, that will change his mind.
-------------------- Make aliyah, and live in the country where your forefathers walked.
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Jul 25 2008, 09:28 AM
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#3
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 hombre salvaje Group: Members Posts: 5,498 Joined: 10-November 05 Member No.: 1,994 |
He would have to make some sort of gesture to apoligize to everyone.
-------------------- My dog doesn't lick his own butt. He doesn't eat poop or step in it. I'll concede that he does smell other dogs' butts and he does lick "himself." I'd prefer it if he doesn't lick me right after that, so I employ a few minutes of buffer time between licking other things and me and I try to get him to drink some water too. - VLG
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Jul 25 2008, 09:31 AM
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#4
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Group: Members Posts: 34,499 Joined: 2-September 03 Member No.: 239 |
QUOTE (Very Lucky Guy @ Jul 25 2008, 10:27 AM)  Suppose your friend and his family (wife 2 kids) made aliyah. Before he left his friends threw him a big party, sponsored kiddush in shul, etc... A few weeks later he changes his, realizing Israel just isn't the place for him. Should he have to pay everyone back for their expenses? No. So many people come back that the people throwing the party should realize it's not a slam dunk. |
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Jul 25 2008, 09:32 AM
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#5
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 Rebbe  Group: Members Posts: 1,091 Joined: 10-February 07 From: Bristol Member No.: 4,893 |
QUOTE (Very Lucky Guy @ Jul 25 2008, 03:27 PM) Suppose your friend and his family (wife 2 kids) made aliyah. Before he left his friends threw him a big party, sponsored kiddush in shul, etc... A few weeks later he changes his, realizing Israel just isn't the place for him. Should he have to pay everyone back for their expenses? After a few weeks? That's a rather hasty decision. But yes, he should endeavor to pay back as much as possible. -------------------- Javol!
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Jul 25 2008, 09:33 AM
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#6
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Mr. Garrison is back! Group: Members Posts: 5,222 Joined: 20-April 05 From: Omicron-Persei 9 Member No.: 1,432 |
QUOTE (melech @ Jul 25 2008, 10:31 AM) No. So many people come back that the people throwing the party should realize it's not a slam dunk. Really? A lot of people come back? I didn't realize that. I'm not sure I can think of anyone out of the small handful of people I know who moved to Isael that moved back to America. -------------------- Nothing, I have nothing to say.
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Jul 25 2008, 09:34 AM
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#7
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hombre salvaje Group: Members Posts: 5,498 Joined: 10-November 05 Member No.: 1,994 |
QUOTE (melech @ Jul 25 2008, 10:31 AM) No. So many people come back that the people throwing the party should realize it's not a slam dunk. If people are going to the trouble to make a goodbye party and all that the least he could do is stay in Israel. -------------------- My dog doesn't lick his own butt. He doesn't eat poop or step in it. I'll concede that he does smell other dogs' butts and he does lick "himself." I'd prefer it if he doesn't lick me right after that, so I employ a few minutes of buffer time between licking other things and me and I try to get him to drink some water too. - VLG
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Jul 25 2008, 09:35 AM
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#8
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 ~~~ Group: Members Posts: 10,681 Joined: 25-November 04 Member No.: 839 |
QUOTE (melech @ Jul 25 2008, 10:31 AM) No. So many people come back that the people throwing the party should realize it's not a slam dunk. Sure, a lot of people move back -- after trying to make it work for a couple of years. I think if you quit after two weeks you haven't really made a good-faith effort to make it work. |
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Jul 25 2008, 09:36 AM
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#9
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Godol Hador Group: Members Posts: 4,190 Joined: 6-March 05 Member No.: 1,237 |
QUOTE (Very Lucky Guy @ Jul 25 2008, 09:27 AM) Suppose your friend and his family (wife, 2 kids) made aliyah. Before he left, his friends threw him a big party, sponsored kiddush in shul, etc... A few weeks later he changes his mind, realizing Israel just isn't the place for him. Should he have to pay everyone back for their expenses? Wow, that would be awkward... Now, I knew a guy who went on Aliyah on Tuesday and was back on Sunday. Seriously. If I were the sochnut or nefesh benefesh I would require: 1. At least 60% proficiency in spoken Hebrew. 2. A 6-month "hachsharah" living among yordim in LA or NY. 3. An "extreme" driving course to help you ease into the Israeli tachburah. 4. Once you're in Israel on our expense, you don't leave until you've gone to the army or else pay us back all we spent on you. (off the record 5. A pledge you'd vote for Ale Yarok for the Knesset...) |
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Jul 25 2008, 09:36 AM
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#10
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hombre salvaje Group: Members Posts: 5,498 Joined: 10-November 05 Member No.: 1,994 |
QUOTE (Goldfish @ Jul 25 2008, 10:35 AM) Sure, a lot of people move back -- after trying to make it work for a couple of years. I think if you quit after two weeks you haven't really made a good-faith effort to make it work. Even if it's only 2 years you need to make it up to the people who said goodbye -------------------- My dog doesn't lick his own butt. He doesn't eat poop or step in it. I'll concede that he does smell other dogs' butts and he does lick "himself." I'd prefer it if he doesn't lick me right after that, so I employ a few minutes of buffer time between licking other things and me and I try to get him to drink some water too. - VLG
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Jul 25 2008, 09:38 AM
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#11
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~~~ Group: Members Posts: 10,681 Joined: 25-November 04 Member No.: 839 |
QUOTE (krumlikeapretzel @ Jul 25 2008, 10:36 AM) Now, I knew a guy who went on Aliyah on Tuesday and was back on Sunday. Seriously. That's really shortsighted. Just about every situation in life takes about a year to adjust to. QUOTE (Psychodad @ Jul 25 2008, 10:36 AM) Even if it's only 2 years you need to make it up to the people who said goodbye No, if you stuck it out for two years and just couldn't make a parnassah or your kids are just struggling too much with school because they can't fit in or aren't learning Hebrew fast enough and you move back, I don't think you have to make anything up to the people who gave you gifts. |
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Jul 25 2008, 09:39 AM
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#12
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 Little Reb Sunshine Group: Members Posts: 13,120 Joined: 16-September 05 From: Washington, DC Member No.: 1,838 |
Butch: I meant "what now" between me and you.
Marsellus: Oh, that "what now." I tell you "what now" between me and you. There is no "me and you". Not no more. Butch: So we cool? Marsellus: Yeah, we cool. Two things: one, don't tell nobody about this. .. It ain't noboby else's business. Two, you leave town tonight, right now, and when you gone, you stay gone or you be gone. You lost all your L.A. privileges. Deal? Butch: Deal. Marsellus: Get your [tuches] out of here. -------------------- Kabel et ha-emet mi-mi she-omro.
"All is by the hand of Heaven, except colds and fevers" -Ketubot 30a. Why won't my wife let me pee against the fence when we have company for a barbecue? -melech ~My Blog~ |
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Jul 25 2008, 09:41 AM
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#13
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Rebbe Group: Members Posts: 1,091 Joined: 10-February 07 From: Bristol Member No.: 4,893 |
QUOTE (Goldfish @ Jul 25 2008, 03:35 PM) Sure, a lot of people move back -- after trying to make it work for a couple of years. I think if you quit after two weeks you haven't really made a good-faith effort to make it work. 
-------------------- Javol!
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Jul 25 2008, 09:44 AM
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#14
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Group: Members Posts: 34,499 Joined: 2-September 03 Member No.: 239 |
QUOTE (Very Lucky Guy @ Jul 25 2008, 10:33 AM) Really? A lot of people come back? I didn't realize that. I'm not sure I can think of anyone out of the small handful of people I know who moved to Isael that moved back to America. Maybe not a lot. Some. I think less than in previous years for a variety of reasons. But it happens. Although a few weeks is obviously really short. Something must have happened. People often go on trial trips like for a year or something. |
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Jul 25 2008, 09:45 AM
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#15
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Rebbe Group: Members Posts: 1,091 Joined: 10-February 07 From: Bristol Member No.: 4,893 |
QUOTE (melech @ Jul 25 2008, 03:44 PM) Maybe not a lot. Some. I think less than in previous years for a variety of reasons. But it happens. Although a few weeks is obviously really short. Something must have happened. People often go on trial trips like for a year or something. They now have a program where you can half make Aliyah... -------------------- Javol!
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Jul 25 2008, 09:46 AM
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#16
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~~~ Group: Members Posts: 10,681 Joined: 25-November 04 Member No.: 839 |
QUOTE (melech @ Jul 25 2008, 10:44 AM) Maybe not a lot. Some. I think less than in previous years for a variety of reasons. But it happens. Although a few weeks is obviously really short. Something must have happened. Things happen. You have to move on. You shouldn't quit so easily. QUOTE People often go on trial trips like for a year or something. That's different -- if you make a specific condition beforehand, kind of like a bli neder, then everyone knows that you might be coming back. QUOTE (bauerskates613 @ Jul 25 2008, 10:45 AM) They now have a program where you can half make Aliyah... What's that? |
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Jul 25 2008, 09:49 AM
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#17
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Godol Hador Group: Members Posts: 4,190 Joined: 6-March 05 Member No.: 1,237 |
QUOTE (Goldfish @ Jul 25 2008, 09:38 AM) That's really shortsighted. Definitely.QUOTE |