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drinking on dates


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#1 geshtunken

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Posted 10 December 2003 - 11:55 PM

3 interrelated questions about the good stuff, addressed primarily to the lady-folk of h.com:

1)would you have a problem with a guy who had a glass of wine on a date? would it matter if it was a restaurant or not, with dinner? any particular reason?

2)would you join the guy for a glass?

3)would you consider drinking other alcoholic beverages different? better or worse?
"I have no problem with ignorance; It's ignorance about ignorance that bothers me."

#2 ChaniMirelHersh

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Posted 10 December 2003 - 11:59 PM

1) As long as it's kosher no worries.
2) Nope, I don't drink with guys.
3) As long as it's not an American beer . . . that's just tasteless.

#3 Nechama

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 12:03 AM

1) Actually if he knows how to order a good wine, thats rather impressive no?

2) I guess if he offered that I could get one too... then again, my dates have forgotten to ask me if I want to order a soda, so who am I kidding?

3) If it was anything else I'd start worrying- Am I such bad company that I can only be tolerated if large quantities alcohol is involved?

Disclaimer: I'd probably be a more fun date after a glass of wine or two...
If I have interesting things on the walls, no one will notice how dirty the floors are - right?

#4 Pazz

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 12:05 AM

1) no problem as long as hes not driving, or theres enough time after the drink for him to be cool
2)no problem
3) yes they are different, but it all depends on the setting
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#5 shayna

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 12:07 AM

Well, my DH and I are now old fogies, so the wildest we ever get is home-made virgin strawberry daquiries. Let the party begin! :guitar:

However, I have a bad association with guys drinking wine, as I once dated a sleazeball who thought it was oh-so-suave to order a bottle of wine with dinner, and try to ply me with more than I could tolerate (which he never managed because I can't stand the stuff).

#6 geshtunken

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 01:44 AM

However, I have a bad association with guys drinking wine, as I once dated a sleazeball who thought it was oh-so-suave to order a bottle of wine with dinner, and try to ply me with more than I could tolerate (which he never managed because I can't stand the stuff).

i DID say a glass...ok, or paper cup ;)...but not an entire BOTTLE! *gasp!*

one of the reasons im asking is because, as CMH was apparently 'mechaven' to, a girl once told me i should go ahead, but that she thinks it's problematic halachically for a gal to drink with a guy.

now of course, not all of us consider one glass of wine 'drinking,' but for her it was low tolerance.
"I have no problem with ignorance; It's ignorance about ignorance that bothers me."

#7 Spot

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 02:37 AM

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#8 mosheshmeal

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 05:51 AM

Wine is usually associated with celebration or Shabbos/Yom Tov or something, isn't it? Who drinks wine during the week anyway?  I dunno, I guess if no one has to drive home or that no one has a secret alcohol problem...  But it doesn't sound innocent, know what I mean?  You're saying one glass of wine, but I hear "get drunk!"

How uncultured can you be?

No fine-dining experience is complete without a glass of wine to complement the meal.

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#9 Shlomo

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 12:42 PM

You're saying one glass of wine, but I hear "get drunk!"

Why? A glass of wine with a nice dinner just goes hand in hand. That Prime Grill steak just tastes way better with a glass of wine. Besides, a glass of wine with a meal doesn't stay in your blood very long.

P.S. This thread has been Protocoled.

#10 Opus

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 01:32 PM

Drinking wine is very non-yeshivish. If you're chassidish you drink schnapps. If you're Lubavitch you drink vodka. And if you're Litvish you don't drink (except for kiddush, at which time you drink the most machmir shiur and get a little dizzy).

In case anyone has any doubts about where I fit in, at Shabbos meals I consistently get a little dizzy.

#11 geshtunken

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 02:02 PM

You're saying one glass of wine, but I hear "get drunk!"

Why? A glass of wine with a nice dinner just goes hand in hand. That Prime Grill steak just tastes way better with a glass of wine. Besides, a glass of wine with a meal doesn't stay in your blood very long.


I won't go as far as MosheShmeale, but this post by Shlomo is exactly right. I don't know why you hear 'get drunk,' Spot. Not at all my intention.

Opus, I don't consider myself litvish, chassidish, OR yeshivish. If I'm at a crusty ol' shteeble I'll knock back the Old Williamsburgs at a kiddush with the guys too, and in Crown Heights, pass the Smirnoff. But that's not the setting I'm talking about.
"I have no problem with ignorance; It's ignorance about ignorance that bothers me."

#12 Opus

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 02:08 PM

Maybe we should add this to the types of Modern Orthodox - likes to drink wine at meals. :D

#13 Nechama

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 02:41 PM

one of the reasons im asking is because, as CMH was apparently 'mechaven' to, a girl once told me i should go ahead, but that she thinks it's problematic halachically for a gal to drink with a guy.

source?
If I have interesting things on the walls, no one will notice how dirty the floors are - right?

#14 Pazz

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 02:49 PM

i heard that too...that a man is not allowed to buy a girl a drink... for some issues that he might get her drunk and rape her probably... who knows...
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#15 Nechama

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 02:56 PM

are we talking Halacha, or common sense?
If I have interesting things on the walls, no one will notice how dirty the floors are - right?

#16 theyid

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 03:11 PM

Then their are the dates that make you want to drink.

#17 geshtunken

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 03:13 PM

one of the reasons im asking is because, as CMH was apparently 'mechaven' to, a girl once told me i should go ahead, but that she thinks it's problematic halachically for a gal to drink with a guy.

source?

her rabbi.
"I have no problem with ignorance; It's ignorance about ignorance that bothers me."

#18 Opus

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 03:14 PM

True, but I can't remember the source offhand. I don't think it is a matter of who pays for the drinks but the actual drinking of alcohol together.

#19 Spot

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 04:21 PM

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#20 shim

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Posted 11 December 2003 - 04:31 PM

First, who drinks only one glass with a whole meal?  If you've had one, why not 2? 2.5?

That depends. In many restaurants you'd order a glass of wine as opposed to a whole bottle.




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