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Kibbudim at a wedding, hierarchy?

naphtaliq's Photo naphtaliq 07 Dec 2010

OK, I have a list of kibuddim, but I also vaguely remember that some are considered more important than others and that some are commonly combined while others aren't... Bueller, anyone?

Witnesses for Tena'im:
1)__________________________
2)__________________________

Witnesses for Kedushin:
1)_________________________
2)__________________________
Witnesses for Kesuba:
1)__________________________
2)__________________________
Sheva Brachos under Chuppa:
1&2)___________________
3)_____________________
4)_____________________
5)_____________________
6)_____________________
7)_____________________
Witnesses for Yichud:
1)__________________________
2)_________________________

After meal Sheva Brachos
Person who benches:
________________________
1)__________________________
2)__________________________
3)__________________________
4)__________________________
5)__________________________
6)__________________________
7)__________________________
Quote

Guest_Melech_* 07 Dec 2010

....
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Bezalel's Photo Bezalel 07 Dec 2010

Personally, I think witnesses for the ketuvah are the biggest kibbud since they will be on the ketuvah, and possibly displayed on the dining room wall, forever.


So one should select witnesses who have attractive handwriting.
Quote

Pinchas's Photo Pinchas 07 Dec 2010

My brother believes, and I agree with him, that the Witnesses for Kedushin are the highest. They are the most important and the entire validity of the marriage rests on them.

However, in our world most people perceive the 7th bracha under the chuppah as being the highest honor, simply because it involves singing and people like singing.

So one should select witnesses who have attractive handwriting.


Or very cool names (like mine... hamavin yavin.)
Quote

Moshi's Photo Moshi 07 Dec 2010

The sheva brachot under the chupah is what I cared about the most. It was mostly rabbis who were important to us.

I don't remember who my kiddushin eidim were. (Isn't it a smarter move to not have someone with impeccable credentials as kiddushin? As an insurance in case you need an out later? Hmm.) Shomer shabbos friends.

One of the rabbis who was supposed to sign the ketubah went to the bathroom or to talk on the phone outside during the signing, so I had to grab another rabbi.
Quote

Guest_Melech_* 07 Dec 2010

....
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Moshi's Photo Moshi 07 Dec 2010

the krum relatives at our wedding were supposed to get sheva brachot for bentching, but then some of them left.
Quote

naphtaliq's Photo naphtaliq 07 Dec 2010

Personally, I think witnesses for the ketuvah are the biggest kibbud since they will be on the ketuvah, and possibly displayed on the dining room wall, forever.
And the eidim, like all eidim, must be of absolutely sterling character ie not passul le'eidut.
Plus one can't claim they were chosen b/c they are related.

That assumes that we are kesuba on teh wall types... I think there's something weird about having your prenup on display.
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Guest_Melech_* 07 Dec 2010

....
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TimeRebbe's Photo TimeRebbe 07 Dec 2010

don't forget witnesses for the secular thing. a lot of people give the kibbud to women for that.

and reading the ketuvah, which apparently a monkey can do.

would have to be a well-trained monkey with a great voice
Quote

Guest_Melech_* 07 Dec 2010

....
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TimeRebbe's Photo TimeRebbe 07 Dec 2010

yeah. and apparently parrots as well.

can it also do the Imperial March?
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Guest_Melech_* 07 Dec 2010

....
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TimeRebbe's Photo TimeRebbe 07 Dec 2010

get it to play pachabel's canon and you have a complete wedding package

you would need more than just one parrot to do pachabel properly
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Guest_Melech_* 07 Dec 2010

....
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TimeRebbe's Photo TimeRebbe 07 Dec 2010

the monkey could play second fiddle

i always thought it was the cat playing the fiddle?
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Guest_Melech_* 07 Dec 2010

....
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TimeRebbe's Photo TimeRebbe 07 Dec 2010

why do some people frame their kesubas and hang them in the living room and others dont?
Quote

Guest_Melech_* 07 Dec 2010

....
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TimeRebbe's Photo TimeRebbe 07 Dec 2010

Personal predilection and taste that says nothing about the couple other than their desire to do so or not to do so at this time or for other reasons unknown?

theres no thread about this?
Quote