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Could someone please help?


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83 replies to this topic

#1 britpip

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Posted 05 January 2011 - 04:24 PM

I found out some years ago that my grandmother (my mums mum) was Jewish, unfortunatly she passed away when my mother was only a child, and as a result my mother was never raised in the jewish faith.
I always thought this made me a 1/4 jewish, but was recently told that this is not the case and that the faith passes down your mothers line, if this is the case does that make me jewish(which would be wonderfull)? and if so would i still have to go through a conversion process ?

Hope very much that you can help.

#2 lyric

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Posted 05 January 2011 - 04:35 PM

If your maternal grandmother was properly Jewish then so was your mother and so are you. Welcome to the faith!
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#3 britpip

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Posted 05 January 2011 - 05:09 PM

If your maternal grandmother was properly Jewish then so was your mother and so are you. Welcome to the faith!

Thank you so much for your reply, that's wonderfull news, what do i do now? do i have to do a conversion coarse or something like that ?

#4 TimeRebbe

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Posted 05 January 2011 - 05:16 PM

Thank you so much for your reply, that's wonderfull news, what do i do now? do i have to do a conversion coarse or something like that ?

if you're jewish, you don't need to "convert" again. What would you like to do? learn what it means to be an orthodox Jew, or just be affiliated somewhat?
"10 a.m. - We begin our descent. On the way down, Chief of Landfills Thorne informs us that Mount Trashmore contains - I am not making this up - human body parts AND dead whales." -Dave Barry
"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination."
"I guess the problem is that I think most people are idiots (granted, WELL MEANING idiots)" --KR

#5 britpip

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Posted 06 January 2011 - 02:45 PM

i'm looking forward to being a full member of the Jewish community, i've looked up a synagogue in my local area, and have bought some books today one by Rabbi Benjamin Blech (understanding Judaism)and another by George Robinson (Essential Judaism) i have also purchased a Torah, and i'm looking forward to lots study time.

Thank you for all your help.

#6 TimeRebbe

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Posted 06 January 2011 - 02:48 PM

i'm looking forward to being a full member of the Jewish community, i've looked up a synagogue in my local area, and have bought some books today one by Rabbi Benjamin Blech (understanding Judaism)and another by George Robinson (Essential Judaism) i have also purchased a Torah, and i'm looking forward to lots study time.

Thank you for all your help.

A torah scroll? those run about 20-50 grand each. do you mean a chumash? (torah in book form)

Best of luck in your endeavors. We'd love you to stay on board as you progress, and welcome to H.com!


"10 a.m. - We begin our descent. On the way down, Chief of Landfills Thorne informs us that Mount Trashmore contains - I am not making this up - human body parts AND dead whales." -Dave Barry
"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination."
"I guess the problem is that I think most people are idiots (granted, WELL MEANING idiots)" --KR

#7 ArielBA

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Posted 06 January 2011 - 03:01 PM

I found out some years ago that my grandmother (my mums mum) was Jewish, unfortunatly she passed away when my mother was only a child, and as a result my mother was never raised in the jewish faith.
I always thought this made me a 1/4 jewish, but was recently told that this is not the case and that the faith passes down your mothers line, if this is the case does that make me jewish(which would be wonderfull)? and if so would i still have to go through a conversion process ?

Hope very much that you can help.


Hi! Im glad to hear that you have chosen to embrace you new faith and "become" a part of the people.
But Im curicous. How have the rest of your family reacted? And if they arent reacting in the same way as you are, what do they thing of your reaction?
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#8 britpip

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Posted 06 January 2011 - 03:13 PM

Sorry my mistake, yes it's a Torah in book form, thank you so much for making me so welcome, look forward to posting again soon.

Thank you once again.

#9 britpip

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Posted 06 January 2011 - 03:50 PM

Hi! Im glad to hear that you have chosen to embrace you new faith and "become" a part of the people.
But Im curicous. How have the rest of your family reacted? And if they arent reacting in the same way as you are, what do they thing of your reaction?

My wife has been very supportive and is behind me 100%, my children are only very young so would not really understand, and i've not told my parents yet, which i'm sure will be fine, i've told some of my friends and they have been great, but i've yet to tell my work colleauges.

Thank you.

#10 usuario

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Posted 06 January 2011 - 03:56 PM

Is your wife Jewish?

#11 Rentsy

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Posted 06 January 2011 - 03:59 PM

This is great. Those are good books.
רמב"ם הלכות תשובה פרק העשירי, הלכה ב

העובד מאהבה - עוסק בתורה ובמצוות והולך במתיבות החוכמה לא מפני דבר בעולם, לא מפני יראת הרעה ולא כדי לירש הטובה, אלא עושה האמת מפני שהוא אמת

הלכה ג

אהבה גדולה יתרה רבה עזה עד מאד, עד שתהא נפשו קשורה באהבת השם ... וכל שיר השירים משל הוא לענין זה

#12 britpip

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Posted 07 January 2011 - 02:54 PM

Is your wife Jewish?

No my wife's not, and she has never had any sort of religous upbringing but she is being very supportive.

#13 usuario

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Posted 07 January 2011 - 04:24 PM

No my wife's not, and she has never had any sort of religous upbringing but she is being very supportive.


Then I suggest that you not seek any further advice from this forum. This is an Orthodox Jewish forum, and Orthodox Judaism is strictly against marriage between Jews and non-Jews, so if you want to become an Orthodox Jew you will have to divorce her.

#14 yoel

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Posted 07 January 2011 - 04:32 PM

Then I suggest that you not seek any further advice from this forum. This is an Orthodox Jewish forum, and Orthodox Judaism is strictly against marriage between Jews and non-Jews, so if you want to become an Orthodox Jew you will have to divorce her.

I don't think that's necessarily true, especially if they have children. I think many rabbis would urge the wife and children to convert if they have an interest. If they have no interest in doing so then yeah, unfortunately, the only real solution would be divorce. IY"H the OP will not be faced with such a difficult situation.

Britpip, are you able to assess whether or not your family is prepared to join you in being a part of G-d's nation who He has singled out to serve Him?
וזה עקר צער של ישראל שיש להם בגלות
הכל הוא מחמת שנפלו מהדעת ותולין
הכל בטבע ובמקרים ובמזל

רבי נחמן מברסלב

#15 usuario

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Posted 07 January 2011 - 04:53 PM

I don't think that's necessarily true, especially if they have children. I think many rabbis would urge the wife and children to convert if they have an interest. If they have no interest in doing so then yeah, unfortunately, the only real solution would be divorce. IY"H the OP will not be faced with such a difficult situation.

Britpip, are you able to assess whether or not your family is prepared to join you in being a part of G-d's nation who He has singled out to serve Him?


Considering that the wife had no religious upbringing, it seems like it would be a bit much to ask her to move to a frum community and start observing kashrut, shabbat, TH"M, and tzniut, among other things. But who knows, IY"H his wife will see the spiritual light of Judaism and convert despite the yoke of the mitzvot.

#16 ArielBA

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Posted 08 January 2011 - 11:37 AM

Considering that the wife had no religious upbringing, it seems like it would be a bit much to ask her to move to a frum community and start observing kashrut, shabbat, TH"M, and tzniut, among other things. But who knows, IY"H his wife will see the spiritual light of Judaism and convert despite the yoke of the mitzvot.


Considering that Britpip is just asking for advise on a jewish forum, is´t it a bit much to tell him to divorce his wife right a way? Chill man, chill. He has just recentlly been told about his jewish heritage.

As I see it, a non religious upbringing might make it easier since she wont have to leave a faith or congreation.

@britpip, what kind of Chumas did you get? I hope you got one with plenty of comments.
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#17 lyric

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Posted 08 January 2011 - 03:36 PM

Purleeze. He just found out he really is Jewish. Next thing is to figure out what his wife and kids want to do about it. He doesn't have to get divorced. When they married he didn't know he was Jewish. Anyway, usuario, since when are you the spokesman for who can and who can't post on here?
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#18 usuario

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Posted 08 January 2011 - 06:31 PM

Purleeze. He just found out he really is Jewish. Next thing is to figure out what his wife and kids want to do about it. He doesn't have to get divorced. When they married he didn't know he was Jewish. Anyway, usuario, since when are you the spokesman for who can and who can't post on here?


I'm not saying that he can't post, but he's in for a lot of hurt if he is convinced (either here or by his LOR) to follow Orthodox Judaism and his wife doesn't want to lead a frum lifestyle. What other choice would he have? I agree that telling him right away that he needs to divorce his wife is not the best kiruv tactic, but it's the truth he might have to face. I feel like it's a bit dishonest to tell him about the sweet aspects of following Torah and only tell him about the bitterness when he's hooked.

#19 TimeRebbe

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Posted 08 January 2011 - 07:06 PM

I'm not saying that he can't post, but he's in for a lot of hurt if he is convinced (either here or by his LOR) to follow Orthodox Judaism and his wife doesn't want to lead a frum lifestyle. What other choice would he have? I agree that telling him right away that he needs to divorce his wife is not the best kiruv tactic, but it's the truth he might have to face. I feel like it's a bit dishonest to tell him about the sweet aspects of following Torah and only tell him about the bitterness when he's hooked.

But thats for his LOR to determine. Not you. Giving someone the cold, hard facts is not nice, or polite, nor is it your place to
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#20 facing_east

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Posted 09 January 2011 - 07:35 PM

I'm a fan of cold hard facts, but I think getting hooked first is certainly the way to do things. How else will you ever know that the "cold hard facts" are worth it?
I wonder why it seems more proper to dish out "cold hard facts" (??) and risk violating the opportunity for intimacy with the sweetness that is also there.




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